"There's a number of words that make me heave, not because they're heave-worthy in themselves but because I don't feel like they really apply to me," said Swinton, decked out in a tailored black top, pants, and black shoes, at TIFF with yet another buzzworthy performance in the chilling British indie film We Need to Talk About Kevin from director Lynne Ramsay.
"There are two descriptions that I would feel happy with. One of them is 'film fan,' straight up, not a problem, I would take it, and the other one is 'artist's model.' But I never wanted to be an actor and I feel incredibly embarrassed and shifty if I get described as one 'cause if feels like it's fraudulent and I'm waiting for real actors to stand up and say, 'Guilty!' "
Swinton, 50, says she originally went to Cambridge University as a writer, before her agent introduced her to experimental filmmaker Derek Jarman who she would go on to make her early seven films in the mid-'80s with before his AIDS-related death in 1994.
"I was in London on the verge of becoming a gambler full-time, and I'm not joking," said Swinton who liked to play the ponies.
"Friendship is really what got me into the cinema in the first place. I think if I hadn't met him there's no way I would be a performer."
When asked if the modern day equivalent exists today she said: "This way of working is very clearly out there. It will never end. Generations will look to this model and will look to working this way and know it's an incredibly valuable way of working, particularly if you don't have any money."
American independent filmmakers discovered Swinton after she made a big splash in Sally Potter's gender-exploring 1992 film Orlando, casting her in such films as 1996's Female Perversions before Hollywood came calling with 2005's Constantine, The Chronicles of Narnia and Michael Clayton.
"Winning an Oscar, I still don't quite know what it means," said Swinton. "I wasn't brought up on this planet. I never wanted to win anything. The only thing I ever wanted to win was the Cheltenhem Gold Cup and I'm not a race horse!"
At the panel, many clips of her seminal films were shown by TIFF artistic director Noah Cowan, and she said of the process: "I'm very happy to be here with you all but it's real torture. It's like looking through that family album of photographs of yourself as a teenager that you hope nobody kept."
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